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Funny Good Jokes, Funny Short Jokes and Inspiring Short Stories.

 

The Numerical World

 

1. Bob Smith, my assistant programmer, can always be found
2. hard at work in his cubicle. Bob works independently, without
3. wasting company time talking to colleagues. Bob never
4. thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always
5. finishes given assignments on time. Often he takes extended
6. measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping coffee
7. breaks. Bob is a dedicated individual who has absolutely no
8. vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound
9. knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Bob can be
10. classed as a high-caliber employee, the type which cannot be
11. dispensed with. Consequently, I duly recommend that Bob be
12. promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be
13. executed as soon as possible.

Is Bob a good employee? Re-read only the odd-numbered lines.

 

 

 

1 day I go 2 climb a 3 outside a house to peep.
But the couple see me, so I'm shocked and 4 down.
The man rushes out and wants to 5 with me,
I run until I fall 6 and throw up.
So I go into 7-Eleven and grabs some 8 to throw at him.
Then I take a 9 and try to stab at him.
10 God he run away.


10 I put the 9 back and pay for the 8 and leave 7-Eleven.
Next morning I call my boss and tell him I'm 6.
He says 5, and fires me, so I don't have to come back 4 work forever.
He also dares me to go climb a 3 and jump down.
I don't understand. I'm so nice 2 him but I don't know what he 1.

10 Q

 

 

'25'

25 useless things on a man:

20 nails you can't hammer;

02 tits you can't milk;

02 balls you can't throw;

01 cock that can't crow.

 

 

'69'

An innocent guy went to a whore and asked,
"What can I get for 300 dollars?"

She said she would do 69.

The guy was happy to hear that although
he had no idea what it was all about.

In the room, she got on top of him and
took up the position, but she farted!

The guy tried to ignore it but she did it again!
This time the smell was even worse!

So he got up and said,
"It's over! I'm not gonna wait for another 67 of them."

 

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